


And The Universe Said I Love You

by orphan_account



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Angst, I guess???, M/M, Other characters will probably come later, Self-Harm, Suicide
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-21
Updated: 2015-03-25
Packaged: 2018-03-18 23:04:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,653
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3587370
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>If you asked Gavin what he regretted the most, he’d probably tell you the whole story. He’d tell you of the wind, that dried out his lips and stung his eyes. He’d tell you of the cold, that made his fingers stiff. He’d tell you how alone he felt, under the night sky. The moon his only company. </p>
<p>And he'd tell you of a boy</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. And The Universe Said I Love You

If you asked Gavin what he regretted the most, he’d probably tell you the whole story. He’d tell you of the wind, that dried out his lips and stung his eyes. He’d tell you of the cold, that made his fingers stiff. He’d tell you how alone he felt, under the night sky. The moon his only company. 

If you asked him why, he’d probably give a small laugh. He’d tell you of the pure darkness that resided within him. He’d tell you how he was the fool, Gavin the fool. As long as he kept making his friends laugh, they’d never know. They looked at his smile, but never at his hands. If they looked at his hands, then well, maybe they’d know. Perhaps not. There weren’t many signs, but whenever he told a joke, or made himself a joke, he’d dig his fingernails into his skin. No one ever saw the display of crescent moons on his skin. No one noticed the scars.

If you asked him what it was like, standing on the ledge of a bridge, he’d tell you he felt at peace. He felt safe, looking at the churning black water, so far down it took his breath away. And as he looked at the night sky, knowing this would be the last time he saw the stars, he smiled. Because he knew it was over, and he could rest. 

When you’re sitting on the railing of a bridge, counting the stars, everything else seems to fall away and disappear. Maybe that’s why Gavin didn’t notice the headlights that approached him, maybe that’s why he didn’t see the man get out of the car. 

What he did notice though, was when that man climbed onto the railing next to him, and sat down. Dangling his legs off the edge, the same as Gavin did. He didn’t say anything, and neither did the man. Gavin looked up at the man, taking in the sight. His curly hair seemed a bit tangled, and dark circles stood out on his pale face. The man was staring into the river, seeming almost frozen in time. Gavin found the long silence comforting almost, but silence is always broken eventually.

“Are you gonna jump?” The man whispered, so quietly Gavin almost didn’t hear him at first.

Gavin nodded his head, clenching his hands into tight fists before saying “I think so.”

The man nodded his head, and it was silent once again. The silence stretched out, and eventually the man jumped back down to solid ground. Gavin was sure he was about to leave, and was both happy and sad about this turn of events. Something about this man intrigued him, but he knew it didn’t matter, since soon he’d be dead anyway. 

The man put his hands in his jacket pockets, and sighed deeply. He opened and closed his mouth a few times, almost like he was trying to get the words untangled from his throat. Finally, he spoke out. “I… I am not going to make you stop.. But.. hear me out.” The man took a deep breath, biting his lip before continuing.

“I know how you’re feeling.. right now.. I guess. I kind of get it. But.. alright so, here we go. We’re on earth right?” The man stopped, seeking an answer for his obvious question. Gavin gave a slight nod, and the man continued. “We’re on earth. There is, roughly, 7 billion people on the planet. Outside planet earth, there is.. an unmeasurable amount of planets. We are just a tiny dot in the entirety of space, not even that. I mean, really.. We’re no one. We’re just one planet, in as far as we know, the infinite mass of space.” The man licked his lips, and looked up at Gavin, staring him in the eye.

“This.. may seem like a reason not to live. But really, it’s a reason to live.” He gave Gavin a small smile. 

“Because, if we’re just one tiny planet, in this infinite landscape, then what does it matter what we do? We can do whatever the hell we want, be whoever the hell we want, and it won’t matter. We won’t matter. You may feel.. Empty, or whatever you’re feeling. Maybe life is shit for you, I don’t know!” The man shrugged before continuing once more. 

“But really, if you destroy whoever or whatever is troubling you, and go out there and do whatever the hell you want, whatever makes you happy, it won’t matter. Because maybe we won’t make a difference in the whole scheme of things, but you can make a difference for yourself. Live your life to the fullest, because the rest of the universe doesn’t care.” The man said, his eyes were alive, and he was scratching at his hands, the same Gavin always did.

“That’s all I have to say. If you still want to jump, I won’t stop you. But.. if you don’t.. I wouldn’t mind getting to know you, or at least driving you home or whatever.” The man said, his cheeks a bright red. 

Gavin looked back into the water, and processed the words the man just said to him. Gavin shrugged his shoulders, because really? Why does it matter if he lived for a little bit longer, just to know more about this interesting man? 

Gavin climbed off the railing, and smiled at the man before giving a small nod. 

“Gavin.” He said, holding out his hand.

The man gave a big smile, before shaking Gavins hand. 

“Michael.”


	2. And The Universe Said You Have Played The Game Well

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Remember how I said I'd put up the next chapter on saturday? I'm a dirty liar and I couldn't wait. Don't expect all updates to happen this soon, but I'm almost done with chapter 3. Look out for that one soon.)
> 
> I was listening to this song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dgQHAQxtKPk on repeat while writing this chapter, it just kind of reminds me of this fic.

When Gavin got into Michael’s car, he felt a little scared. Michael might be insane for all he knew, he really didn’t know anything about him, besides his name and the fact he knew how to talk a suicide jumper out of jumping. 

But that thought only lasted momentarily, because Gavin really didn’t care what happened to him, he didn’t really care if this man hurt him. It’s not that Gavin wanted to die, it’s that he never had a reason to live. 

In a way, that was the source of all his problems.

Michael got into the drivers seat, turning the heat on and putting his hands in front of the vents before asking Gavin where he lived. Gavin sighed. 

“I don’t really have a home anymore, my mum and dad kicked me out a while ago because they wouldn’t have a son who ‘chose’ to be bisexual live in their house.” Gavin said, giving a small laugh.

“That sucks... I’m sorry. I went through sort of the same thing when I came out as gay to my mom..” Michael looked down sadly for a moment before recovering. 

“So.. where to then..?” Michael asked while putting some distance between them and the bridge.

“Uh.. well I guess you could ju-” 

“Wait, what about my place? We could.. hang out.. I kind of wanna know more about you.” Michael admitted. 

“Oh Michael, I don’t think so.. I’d just be a burden.” Gavin said sadly, lightly digging his nails into his arm.

“I’m not asking you to move in or anything, c’mon. And also, how did you just say my name?” Michael laughed before saying “Micoooo” in a mock british accent. Gavin grit his teeth, once again, he was the fool.

“Ah.. Shit.. I’m sorry. That’s kind of just how I am, I do that kind of stuff all the time.. Don’t worry, I think it’s cute.” Michael reassured. 

Gavin was taken by surprise. None of his friends ever noticed that he got upset when they made fun of him.

He also called Gavin cute.

“It’s alright.” Gavin said, trying to hide his smile. 

It only took 5 minutes to get to Michaels place. 

As Gavin looked at the old weathered down apartment building, he wondered how he came to this point in his life. 10 minutes ago he was standing on a ledge, breathing what he thought was going to be his last breaths. And now he’s standing in front of an apartment building, with someone he doesn’t even know.

The universe works in a very strange way.

Gavin walked up several flights of stairs with Michael, watching dark clouds quickly cover the night sky, wiping the stars away into nonexistence. He ran a hand quickly through his hair, cringing at how knotty and dirty it was. The last time he washed his hair was in a sink at a gas station a week ago, and he didn’t own any brushes. He wished he looked a bit better, even though he was with a stranger who knew he was homeless.

“This apartment.” Michael said, pointing at a door down the hall. Gavin and Michael walked to the apartment door, while Michael fumbled to get his keys. When Michael opened the door, it looked almost exactly like what Gavin expected. 

In front of him was the living room, a black couch pointed towards the tv. An Xbox with several games on the tv stand. There were two doors in the back, Which he assumed were Michael’s bedroom and bathroom. The small space was mostly spotless, besides a few scattered video games.

Gavin was actually surprised how bare boned Michael’s apartment was, for some reason, he expected more to it. 

“Welcome to my humble abode” Michael said, plopping down on the couch. Gavin hesitantly sat next to him. They looked at each other awkwardly momentarily. 

“I’m not sure exactly what to do.. or say.. I’ve never exactly done something like this before.” Michael said, averting his eyes to the floor.

Gavin slouched down, briefly closing his eyes. He wanted to ask so many questions about Michael, but he settled on one. 

“Hey Michael, this may seem a little weird to ask, and out of the blue, but.. What do you believe in? Like.. Religion wise or whatever.” Gavin said.

“I guess what I’m asking is if you believe in an afterlife.” He added quickly

Michael gave a small chuckle. “Man, you really wanna do this? I mean.. I don’t believe in a specific religion or anything.. but..” Gavin turned to face Michael, nodding his head for him to continue. 

“I guess I kind of believe in.. I don’t know, the universe? I believe that we were put here, for no real reason really. I think we just kind of exist. I think the universe just put us here for the hell of it. Just plopped us down and forgot about us. I bet the universe has better things to do than take care of us.” He said, leaning his head on Gavins shoulder and smiling lazily. 

“As for the afterlife, I don’t know. I believe in ghosts, but I don’t really know where I think I’ll go afterwards.. I guess I’ll see at some point.” Michael said, scooting only a little closer to Gavin. Gavin almost didn’t notice, almost.

“That’s not really poetic is it?” Michael said quietly. 

They both heard the pitter patter of heavy rain from outside. Silence briefly overtaking them.

Gavin laid his head on top of Michaels, his heart beating a little faster than usual. “I don’t think it really has to be, but I like that Michael. I like how you think.” He said slowly while drawing small imaginary designs on Michaels arm, feeling.. Okay. He felt okay for once.

Michael gave a slight mhm before yawning. 

“Sorry, I’m just kind of tired. Long day huh?” Gavin nodded before closing his eyes. Unknowingly, they both closed their eyes at the same time. 

It didn’t matter that the light was still on, or that the rain had grown steadily louder, or even that this was the first time Gavin had fallen asleep with a roof over his head in months. Because it really had been a long day.

For both the jumper, and the savior

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YOOOOO THIS CHAPTER IS OVER 1000 WORDS ARE YOU PROUD OF ME MOM (I always seem to find a PERFECT place to stop around 1000 words, usually less. That's why I have short chapters)


	3. And The Universe Said Everything You Need is Within You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I might starting adding specific songs that made me thing of the fanfiction while I was writing it. 
> 
> http://www.yourepeat.com/watch/?v=jmJgdQwrG1Y
> 
> (I was too lazy to get it out of yourepeat lmao)
> 
> (Also I'm addicted to writing this story, like I said before, updates won't always be this often, I'm just in a really good writing place right now)

When Gavin first awoke, the first thing he noticed was he had a stiff neck. The second thing he noticed was that his body had shifted to an awkward angle at some point during the night, and his head was on Michaels stomach. They both must of slipped into a laying down position while they slept. 

The final thing Gavin noticed, was how weird it felt to awake with a solid roof over his head, and to not be awoken by a man yelling him to get out of the way, or someone telling him he can’t sleep there.

It felt nice. 

The brit looked up at Michael, finding that watching his chest slowly move up and down was soothing. And soon he found himself closing his eyes once more, with a small smile etched on his lips.

Gavin woke up the second time with the smell of bacon to rise him. He thought back quickly to the last time he ate, which was a few days ago when a nice lady took him out to lunch.

And while Gavin has grown use to not eating for days at a time, he was still hungry. He slowly arose, spending more time than necessary to stretch.

Gavin looked out the window, and saw that the rain was coming down in buckets. It had grown worse since last night, and didn’t show any sign of stopping. Gavin smiled, happy that at least he wouldn’t have to go back outside for a little bit longer. 

Actually, now that he thought about it, he realized he probably should be going soon. Gavin cursed, realizing he left all of his belongings at the bridge. He hoped no one stole his bag, since otherwise he was pretty much screwed. Even if no one did, all his belongings were definitely soaked.

Gavin got off the couch, walking to the kitchen where Michael was furiously waving his hands back in forth, trying to dissipate the smoke that came from the pan, cursing under his breath.

Actually, now that Gavin was fully awake, he realized that it did smell like burning bacon. Gavin snickered, alerting Michael to his presence. Michael turned off the stove, waving his hands a few more times to try to clear the last of the smoke. 

“So.. In the mood for burnt bacon?” Michael said, causing Gavin to laugh once more. 

“I’ve had worse.” Gavin said in between snickers. 

Michael put the burnt bacon on a plate, handing it to Gavin. 

“I don’t usually cook.. Actually, this might be one of my better results when attempting to makes breakfast.” Michael said, moving the pan to the sink. 

“Oh, sorry there’s no eggs or anything. I haven’t gone shopping in a while. All I had was bacon.” Michael said apologetically.

“S’all right.” Gavin said. 

Really, Gavin was just happy to have something to eat at all. 

Gavin sat back down on the couch, Michael doing the same. Gavin ate in silence, offering a piece to Michael, who accepted it wordlessly. 

“So.. What now?” Michael said with a mouthful of bacon.

Gavin shrugged. “I guess I’ll be getting out of your hair sometime today, get my stuff at the bridge, since I left it there. If it’s still there that is.” He said, breaking up a piece of bacon into tiny pieces. 

Michael frowned, his forehead creasing. Michael thought for a moment before saying “You know.. You don’t have to leave.. If you don’t want to that is.”

Gavins eyebrows furrowed. “What do you mean?” What Michael was saying flew over his head completely.

“I mean.. If.. If you want to.. You can live here..?” Michael said, biting his lip hard.

Gavins eyes widened. “Oh no! I could never ask that of you Michael! Really, I’ll figure something out..” 

Michael sighed.

“I… Really would like you to stay. Not out of pity, I just.. really like you.” 

Gavins mouth opened out of shock, and Michael quickly realized how it’d sounded.

“Aghh as a friend I mean! I really like you as a person, as a friend!” Michael said.

Gavin nodded, ignoring the slight disappointment that he felt. 

Because there’s no way he’s falling in love with Michael.

“I mean.. If.. You really want me to stay.. I guess I can.” Gavin said. 

Michael nodded. 

“Great! Really thats fantastic! I’ll uh.. Wash your plate and then we can go get your stuff. Is that alright?” 

“Yeah.” Gavin said happily.

Michael grabbed Gavins plate, and left to the kitchen. Gavin looked out the window, watching the raindrops slide down the window. 

Michael came back a few minutes later with his jacket on, another in his hand.

“Here.” Michael said, handing the jacket to the brit. 

“Thanks.” Gavin said, sliding it on. 

“You can keep it, cmon lets go.” Michael said, grabbing Gavins hand and dragging him outside before he could protest. 

While the rain looked peaceful from the window, outside it seemed chaotic. The two quickly ran towards the car, their hoods offering little protection. They both hopped in quickly, their hair already damp. 

Gavin looked at Michael and laughed. 

“What?! Whats so funny?” Michael exclaimed.

Gavin tried to calm his giggles, but found himself unable to. 

“Your hair looks funny when its wet.” Gavin said before laughing again.

“You fucking idiot.” Michael said, a not-so-discreet tone of affection behind it.

Michael started the car, and headed in the direction of the very thing that almost ended the giggling boy next to him.

He tried to not think about it, really he didn’t. But Michael really couldn’t help but wonder what would’ve happened if he didn’t show up when he did. He didn’t have to think too hard about it, because he knew what would’ve happened. He knew Gavin would’ve done it. 

Michael grit his teeth, and wondered exactly why this mattered so much to him. He knew why it mattered to him, he really did. He just didn’t want to admit it to himself. He hadn’t even known the kid a day and he was already developing a serious crush on him.

“You alright Michael?” Gavin asked, a look of concern on his face. 

“I’m fine.” Michael said expressionlessly.

“You sure? You zoned out for a second there..” 

Even something as simple as this made Michael want to burst into a grin, he had it bad and he knew it.  
“Yeah, I’m really okay Gavin. I’m great even.” Michael said smiling, trying to suppress his grin but failing significantly.

Gavin nodded. “Good.” 

When they arrived they immediately noticed Gavins backpack next to the railing. Gavin got out and went to grab it. 

Michael watched Gavin walk towards the railing, and a wave of fear quickly washed over him. He was scared Gavin was going to leap over the railing, disappearing without a trace. 

Michael was getting ready to leap out of the car and run towards Gavin, but the brit was already heading back towards the car, and Michael felt a surge of relief. 

Gavin hopped in the car, holding up the pack and sighing deeply. 

“I can throw your stuff in the dryer when we get home.” Michael reassured. 

Home. That simple word made Gavins heart soar, and he stopped caring that all his clothes were soaked. 

“That’d be great.” Gavin said. 

When they arrived home Michael threw all of Gavs clothing in the dryer, heading to his room, Gavin following him in.

Michael threw Gavin a pair of boxers out of the dresser, throwing a pair of pajama pants and a baggy shirt as well. The shirt smacking Gavin right in the face. Michael snickered while Gavin poked out his tongue. 

“Can I take a shower? If that’s alright..” Gavin asked.

“Yeah, thats fine.” Michael said, throwing a towel in Gavins face. Michael sat on the bed and laughed loudly. 

Gavin threw the towel right back at him, flipping him off.

“Just go take a shower you idiot.” Michael said, throwing Gavin the towel once more, grinning widely. 

And so Gavin did, but not before messing up Michaels hair, quickly running into the bathroom screaming idiotically. 

Gavin stayed in the shower for an hour, feeling cleaner than he ever felt in his life. When he got out he put on Michaels clothes, giving a small smile at just the fact that he was wearing something of his. 

Gavin knew it was a bad idea to start liking Michael, but he couldn’t help it. He really couldn’t.

Gavin messed with his hair, only succeeding in making in worse before leaving the bathroom. Michael was in the living room playing a video game. Gavin sat down next to him, and watched him play in silence for a while. 

“Thank you, really. Thank you so much.” Gavin said after a few minutes. 

Michael raised his eyebrows.

“For what?” 

Gavin huffed. “Are you kidding me Michael? Since yesterday you saved my life, let me stay at your house for a night, and then offered to let me live here!” Gavin said.

“Hmm.. Now that I think about it I guess I was kindaaaa nice..” Michael said teasingly.

Gavin shoved him lightly before watching Michael play again. After a while he slowly fell into deep thought, losing focus on the game. Gavin realized what a predicament he had found himself in. Of course Gavin wasn’t completely okay now, at the moment he was okay, but he knew that feeling always fell apart soon after. Gavin was really starting to like Michael, and the feeling was only growing more prominent and hard to ignore. 

Gavin was never good with his feelings, he had a hard time keeping it in and hidden. He really had no clue how other people did it.

There was also the fact that Michael is letting him stay with him, and Gavin doesn’t have the money to pay for bills or even food. All he has is a few crumpled dollars that he got from panhandling. Gavin bit his lip. 

“Hey Michael?”

“Yeah Gav?” Michael said without looking away from the screen. 

“I think I need a job.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AYYYY GIVE IT UP FOR A KINDA LONG CHAPTER HEYOOOOO
> 
> (Also I feel like this chapter sounds rushed but I'm just gonna ignore that feeling or I'll never finish this chapter)


End file.
